Beer Review – Guinness Dublin Porter

You’d think I’d have learned a lesson last time, wouldn’t you? Guinness is fine, but stick to what they do best: the stout. Anything else is likely to taste like a weird, alternate universe of the same beer, and not in a good way.

Still, I need some negative reviews on here or it would get boring. I hope you’re enjoying this more than I am.

Guinness Dublin Porter glass and bottle
I had to be careful to say “glass and bottle” in the alt-text so Google’s spiders wouldn’t think I’m writing about bottoms

As if their hold on the brewing world weren’t sufficiently tight already, Guinness also produces a “Dublin porter”. It’s a rich, dark brown in colour, with a smell like dark fruits and cloves. My first impression is that it smells like Christmas, which is not what I was expecting to drink in mid-July, but hey, bottles. This way I can maintain Christmas in my liver all year round, just like the bible says (at least I assume so).

With that aroma, I’m actually quite excited to get a taste of this beer, but the first mouthful is a complete no-show. There’s some light effervescence, a pleasant smoothness – presumably a bit of wheat mixed in with the barley malt – but where’s the flavour?

It’s a little smokey and earthy from the chocolate malt they’ve used, but that’s the only flavour I can really pick out. There’s no depth to the Guinness Dublin Porter, no excitement. And at £5 a bottle (admittedly at a hip east London bar), there’s no way I could ever recommend this.

I appreciate the effort, Guinness. But please, please, please stick to the stout. 1/5

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